Tuesday, July 14, 2020

The Washington Football Team

I've been calling them the Washington Football Team for at least 20 years.  Now they've finally dumped their racist obscenity of a name, but they haven't announced a new one.  So more or less officially they are at this moment the Washington Football Team.

A new name is a new opportunity, especially for expressing some imagination.  Some of the names that spring immediately to mind are unlikely I suppose: the Washington Bureaucrats, the Washington Beltway, the Lobbyists, the Washington Windbags.  Or if they want to change colors, the Washington Greenbacks.

The betting money is on some close variation of traditional football names like the Redtails (the Tuskegee Airmen's World War II outfit) or the Warriors.  The Washington Warriors is practically a default at this point, though it arguably doesn't distance them from Native American connotations quite enough.  But it's an English word with a variety of referents.  It's just a dull choice, and I say that as an NBA Golden State Warriors fan.

A better choice it seems to me would to emulate the WNBA pattern, and go big and a bit abstract.  The Washington Mystics are the WNBA champions, and the league contains teams named Dream, Sky, Sun and Storm.  Why not take a page from the New York team's approach, the Liberty?  How about the Washington Freedom, or the Washington Independence?  The major league baseball team went in that direction as the Washington Nationals.

Of course they will have a problem figuring out a logo to go with it.  The New York Liberty uses the Statue of for its logo--Lady Liberty being among the few non-controversial monuments anywhere in America.  The Washington Football Team could use the Washington Monument or the Lincoln Memorial, but that's a risk these days.

But emulating the WNBA style is probably too girly--and too imaginative--for the NFL.  The Washington Team should take its time deciding anyway, because the chances of a season this year are slim.  The NBA bubble is already bursting, as key players go down and the championship seems like it will go to the team that best avoids infection.  If they actually play this year at all.  I'm still not counting on it.

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