"It was their idea," Senate Majority Leader Ted "Tailgunner" Cruz claimed, pointing to a letter to the editor published in a Canadian newspaper.
"Many of us Canadians are confused by the U.S. midterm elections," wrote Richard Brunt of Victoria, British Columbia. "Consider, right now in America, corporate profits are at record highs, the country's adding 200,000 jobs per month, unemployment is below 6%, U.S. gross national product growth is the best of the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) countries. The dollar is at its strongest levels in years, the stock market is near record highs, gasoline prices are falling, there's no inflation, interest rates are the lowest in 30 years, U.S. oil imports are declining, U.S. oil production is rapidly increasing, the deficit is rapidly declining, and the wealthy are still making astonishing amounts of money."
America is leading the world once again and respected internationally — in sharp contrast to the Bush years. Obama brought soldiers home from Iraq and killed Osama bin Laden. So, Americans vote for the party that got you into the mess that Obama just dug you out of? This defies reason."
"All that leftist socialist Kenyan uppity Nazi stuff was pretty disgusting," Cruz claimed. "But he had one good idea that he ended his letter with."
Brunt's final sentence was this: "When you are done with Obama, could you send him our way?"
Cruz could hardly control himself when he saw that, he intimated loudly. So he got his GOP colleagues together, they contacted Canadians they knew (mostly in the oil industry) and quickly made a deal.
Douglas Ford is a Toronto city councillor, the brother of former Toronto mayor Rob Ford and part owner of Deco Labels and Tags. He was recently defeated in his electoral bid to become mayor of Toronto.
When a US reporter informed the GOP officials that Ford is not the Prime Minister of Canada, GOP senator-elect Joni Ernst of Iowa said, "That's your opinion."
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